Type 1 Diabetes is an interesting meditation.
Straight Lines Don’t Exist
Fools imagine this linear process. They think we just take some shots and we’re good.
It’s a bit more complicated.
Type 1 Diabetes is an invitation into the highest practice of ceaseless mindfulness. Aware of food. Aware of activity. Aware of emotional states. Always aware, the Type 1 Diabetic is yogi supreme.
Every moment of her life is intentional. From moment to moment she chooses to remain alive. Others remain living despite their own intentions, diabetics remain living because they choose to remain mindful.
Some years back, diabetes was a death sentence. Now, we are vampires living off the juices excreted by a genetically modified bacteria!
Thank playful consciousness!
The sun is shining more these past few days so I decide to ride my bike way more often.
The big shift in my daily exercise has a huge impact on how my body uses the long acting insulin I take at night and in the morning. I exercise more and my insulin resistance goes down. As a result, the long acting insulin hanging around in my bloodstream is used and my blood sugar dives. Over and over and over throughout the day and night.
At night, asleep, my blood sugar goes low and I wake up in that familiar state of extreme bodily agitation. Adrenaline. Tingly skin. From many years of enduring this strange condition, the panic of the body is not much of a pain to the observing-process (awareness, “ego”).
I’ve never actually lost consciousness from low blood sugar, although my blood sugar has read as low as 22. It’s all about mindfulness. I’ve walked for miles near death, ten feet above my body, guiding the flesh balloon to the nearest gas station for sugar. I love this body.
Buuut, I have lost consciousness from high blood sugar. And I almost died. I was driving. I hit a tree at 60 mph and woke up in the hospital.
Managing diabetes is like trying to hit a moving target.
I am paying doctors for their ability to prescribe drugs– I know more about diabetes in general, and about my specific experience of diabetes, than they can ever hope to learn.
But this doctor-hating is another topic, for another day. I am ultimately annoyed by some doctors’ sense of entitlement– from experience, I can say that a bunch of these pieces of shit believe they exist within some superior caste.
If I had not been diagnosed with Diabetes back in 2003, I would surely be dead today. It’s been a wild ride, but I can see how much of a blessing it has been.
One of the Immeasurable Merits of the Infinite Meanings Sutra is the power of transformation. It turns a deluded one into a perfect Buddha.
As a Child of the Snake Mother, I have tried to accept our snakish movements through [non]reality and have thereby been transformed by her infinite[immeasurable, inconceivable] firelight.
The most mundane thing is the most spiritually exalted and most of the DocPriests are lost as f*$%.
GATE GATE PARAGATE PARASAMGATE BODHI SVAHA
O, Lord Diabetes Snake,
Shine your infinite light of compassionate wisdom,
and burn all this foolishness and hate to naught.