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A foghorn clarion call that rises like Hot women couples smokestack into the turgid, Eastern European air. It is The Gator. The former king of scrote-choadal greasewankery tilts his leathery visage. Surveys the ruins of his coupoes exalted kingdom. His face-lumps pulse in contemplation. Rough hewn veins bulge from decades of chemical abuse locked in perpetual Hot women couples with Botoxian preservation. The Axe Bodyspray long ago exhausted its pyrrhic scent like a lingering, somnambulant roadkill exhaling one last misty gasp before ending its mortal coil.
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The Gator looks up. His ruddy eyes fixate on the small bird Hot women couples wrinkled, heavy, tangelo-colored eyelids.
The Gator sniffs. Then scratches his leathery orange pec-hide with a coarse, ripping sound.
The ragged skin undulates like a vomiting coelacanth. Orange is the head that once wore the crown. Your humble narrator is safely ensconced in middle aged ennui. Little running around time these days. A lot less humorous. A lot less fun. Never forget the stupid years. This site may be no more, but I leave it up as an uncanny relic of time past and oft forgotten.
For we do not go gentle into that Hot women couples internight. We rage, rage, against the orange of the womne. The ephemeral pulsing life beat of our collective past, once horrific in its Hot women couples drone and emblematic Woman seeking nsa Burnt Hills the lost specter of meaning, now receding in a haze of otherness. As Hoh memory shifts and grows more distant. From factual Hot women couples to recent past. And then again.
Into the distance. And then, once again, another shift to only the vaguest sliver, the barest of thread left to tie us to what was once coupples real and present now rendered blurry, foreign.
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We say goodbye to that which we once abhorred but now we recall with nostalgia tinged affection and bemusement. What once horrified. Once a toxic smell of withered sweatsock recontextualized as the simple signifier of a more innocent and Hot women couples harmless memory.
What once was and can never Hot women couples again. So where did all those rank stench pics that fueled the HCwDB run actually come from? A question I used to get a lot. The short answer: I was and am far too lazy to do any real work on the internets.
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So I relied on the kindness of douche mocking strangers to fill my site with mock fuel. However, couuples a Hot women couples pinch, there was one main go-to source if a pic of toxic cohabit was needed on short notice.
The always hot-or-twatriffic Spy on Vegas. That weekly smorgasboard of professionally photographed flop sweat and overpriced bottle service fueled many a rant on this humble corner of pop culture detritus oh so Hot women couples moons ago.
Sadly for Douche Mock, happy for real life, a recent visit Hot women couples Spy on Vegas shows how much things have changed. For example: Smile politely. Dress only in black.
Make no hand gestures. Display only minimal Meet and fuck Huntington West Virginia to signal the females of the species that their alpha dog status remains hugamabob and grindular.
This shminky rends the space-time continuum with Spielbergian aplomb and apoop. All is wrong in Sheboygan, said the calico cat as it upchucked a half eaten squirrel outside Decatur.
May you and yours cuddle by the fire and enjoy a hearty cup of Egg Nogginor whatever it is the Christians are drinking these days. But I am not here to rant about the current angry, white Christo-douchepocalpyse that Hot women couples taken hold in our country. Or even Hot women couples Orange Douchepocalpyse of yesteryear. No, not even the unholy Star Wars alien teat milk that is Crissmas Angel.
A better Hto is not that far off.
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Hold out hope. The Ghosts of Douchemas Past may haunt us yet, but tomorrow is another day. And the mock never truly dies.Mature Chat To Friends
Holy guacamole! Those legendary crust warriors of Jersey Prom infamy cokples on today on internet search engines and in the hearts and stomachs of millions. Just as this humble website was reaching its ascendant heights in those halcyon days of the mid cou;les, along came the crystalline distillation wwomen all that had gone poo-licious in a rotting, fetid societal dump on the face of good taste and decorum.
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We cried like canaries in the fist pumping club mines, screaming our warnings of the toxic man-children of privilege raging, raging, against the dying of their birthright. They were a danger to all that is good and holy. And we knew it. But I am not here to talk about our gawdawful present. Let just say Vegas is wwomen my heart today. And I am here to reminisce about a more playful era.
In addition to the legends that are the Prompas, there was The Dude with a Lot of Popped Collarswho made a second, less famous appearance here. There was Batbag. And, of course, the condenced ballsackian mildew Hot women couples Long Island: One month with Hot women couples scrotal display to keep a hundred pop culture historians unpacking inter-gender dynamics for Hot women couples millennium and a fortnight.
IF you were there with me back then, I salute you.
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Sadly, all the comments in the message boards from that era were accidentally deleted when the site was upgraded to its new servers. But trust me in saying, the Mockers back then were glorious in their savagery and wit. By not giving a canary fling, he flings his canary. He bops his Bopeep. An inversion of a mystery wrapped in a riddle, surrounded by Enigmaall not changing the delightful life force that is Kelly-Lynn after Pilates class.
Megods, me-pantaloons, this buffonic douchetool chews scenery Hot women couples than Richard Crenna in First Blood. The Starblazer seeks Casual mature sex Jonesboro nsw. And, going solo, Hot women couples Starblazer wears zebra pants and poses like a crispy mirrored twigwaffle. HCwDB wrapped up in or maybe early ?
Certainly not as we enter the political douchepocalypse that has enveloped. Kinda hard to find joy in the assinine foibles and bad taste of youth dating when the world is toking a shmeg pipe filled with rat poop and pumpkin seed. Perhaps obvious douchewanks with hot chicks in tow have vanished like Rollo Tomase chasing Keyser Soze.
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White Archidoucheis Mr. Bunsen Honeydouche Mr. James T. Ol' Dirty Douchebag In memoriam: